The clients we work with have often endured very difficult circumstances, and it’s important to be sensitive to that fact. The following best practices will help ensure that your security and safety input may be received without causing undue stress and harm to the client.

• Listen. While our primary focus is on keeping them safe, sometimes just knowing that they’re heard and believed can make a big difference. At the same time, we’re not trained therapists or psychologists and are not properly equipped to provide therapeutic services beyond that. Whenever possible, encourage the client to seek therapy to help work through the trauma they’ve
• Support their autonomy and free agency. Remember that the client makes the final decision in all things, our job is to recommend and suggest solutions while being sensitive to the fact that the client is the one that would have to deal with the outcome. The client may not have been able to make many choices while in an abusive situation, so it’s important that they know we’re on their
• Recognize that sometimes things might not make sense. And that’s okay. When you’re working with clients that may not be as experienced as you are in your area of expertise, you may recognize some things that aren’t possible. It’s important to counter those misconceptions without isolating or embarrassing the client. Understand that sometimes victims of a crime will try to fill in the missing pieces with their own research or reasoning, so that may account for some variances in their
• Be sensitive to their needs, and know that they’re frightened. The client may push back or cast doubt on your ability to help. That’s not personal, but a common outcome of severe abuse and manipulation. Remember that abusers often lie about their abilities, so the victim may believe that the abuser is more skilled or capable than you are. The abuser may even have told their victim that they can do things that aren’t possible, such as “I can immediately hack any computer you use, no matter where you are.” Be patient, and take opportunities to educate them on what can and cannot reasonably be done. You can do this by providing facts and
• Never blame the survivor. That’s what their abuser did. Although it seems counterintuitive, avoid making disparaging comments about the abuser. Given the complex psychological process involved with escaping abuse, they may not be ready to hear those things. Focus on the behavior rather than the
• Don’t underestimate the risk to the survivor, but don’t make it sound worse than it is either. Understand that there is risk and they’re likely to be very aware of it. At the same time, don’t cause further harm by suggesting things that they may not have considered but are highly unlikely. For example, it may be possible to leverage a certain attack against the client’s device, but the attacker would need resources only found with state
• Be aware that certain actions may alert the abuser that they’ve been discovered. For example, removing stalkerware is likely to be detected by the abuser. Ensure that other security measures are in place, if required, to protect the client for escalation or retaliation.